At last … my first blog (after a long hiatus!) ;=) hehe … I say it like it’s a first novel I wrote that got published! ;=)
You see … I’ve been trying to set up a blog here in friendster and it kept going back to the home page (for some odd weird reason)! It was a simple instruction, right? ‘create a blog’ … but no! mine has to take at least a day and a ‘blog’ expert’s help to have it set up!
I keep resisting the temptation to have a blog since I don’t know if I’ve got something deep and meaningful to say … you know stuff that will inspire people! ;=) hehe but then again … what the hell! It’s my thoughts anyways … and since you’re reading it … I got you interested in what I have to say! ;=)
So here I am … on my first entry. Not really because I finally realized that I actually have something to say! Actually, I’m at work right now and I don’t have a car yet and been waiting for a friend to give me a ride home … and I’m done working!!! So there … trying to kill time and trying to be nostalgic … and oh … I almost forgot … I just broke up with my first ever boyfriend (at the age of 29! – yup, graduated late in the NBSB club to join coupledom only to be booted out after only ~four months) and I’m looking for a release! ;=) hehe
I say it like an afterthought like it didn’t matter and like I’m not hurt! ;=) Actually I am, but I feel so much better now … if you consider not crying better vs. bawling … then yeah … I’m better! ;=) Got my act together now! I actually am a believer of indulging in your sadness, misery, sorrow (and what not) and give it one big cry (or one big loooong cry) and after that you’re done! You’ve emptied your tear ducts and ready to face the world again! (thank God I wasn’t one of those people who get really big, really ugly eye bags when they cry!) and oh yeah … I’m also a firm believer of telling all your close friends what happened and getting every single possible canned feel-good advice you can get from them! ;=) hehe (I really appreciate it, BTW!)
So there … my stint at being in a relationship and my first broken heart! I can probably list down all the if-onlys and could-have-beens that went through my mind when I was down in the dumps! Yeah … there are a lot of them and things really could have been different and I wouldn’t be so sad right now! But I guess as the sourgraping cliché goes … I wouldn’t really trade anything for those four months! As I told my friend … you really can’t have the thrill of being in love without the risk of having your heart broken in the process. So this is how it feels like! All those hype and drama of a break up! Now I know.
